Being the writer of a beauty blog people automatically assume I’ve always been into makeup, the darling of Sephora if you will.   I would be remiss if I didn’t address these assumptions.  I was by far an "Ugly Duckling".   I was rail thin with glasses thicker than anything you’ve seen before. My family was poor, I had no designer clothes, barely ate. Forget about beauty products we barely had the necessities.  I too received my share of being bullied, taunted, and laughed at. I hated the way I looked, my confidence and self esteem non-existent. I longed to be the pretty cheerleader, or even the girl people looked at. I was invisible, practically friendless. Thick glasses and the ability to hula hoop with a cheerio will do that. 

Today, I still haven't grown to that model height, I'm barely five feet two, I'm twice the size I was back then. Come to think of it the only real difference is now I wear contacts and I'm comfortable in my own skin.

Every day I receive emails from teenagers coming forward saying how much they’ve been bullied because of their looks, asking advice on what they can do to stop it. I’m sorry to say my lovelies but there is no magical tool to give you “standard” looks. We all need to embrace the beauty we have. After 31 years of struggling with my reflection I’ve learned to embrace my nose, it gives me character. I’ve learned to accept I’ll never be a size two, my curves define me. Best of all I’ve learned the person in the mirror is unique there is no one like me therefore I am beautiful.

'My personal belief is that, God never intended that we look like carbon copies of the next person riding the train, or the starlet on the red carpet. He who created the heavens, the earth, all the variety of flowers and animals alike, created us to be different -- not just in our appearance but with distinct personalities, interests, talents, and goals. If we all looked the same what a boring unimaginative world would we live in. He created us all to be WORKS OF ART ....with or without the help of make-up.

The bottom line is - everyone has their “ugly duckling” phase. No one is immune, even the popular jock in your school will have days of self doubt. It’s what being human is about. How can someone find you pretty or handsome if you hate the way you look? I promise you there will come a day where you say fuck it, I love me. When that day arrives I can show you how to be your very own Sephora darling.

My friend Jasmine started me on my makeup journey four years ago, when I battled her tooth and nail not ready to try anything new she gave me this poem. Her absolute favorite by Erma Bombeck written the year I was born 1979:

As Erma Bombeck wrote it back in 1979:

Someone asked me the other day if I had my life to live over would I change anything.

My answer was no, but then I thought about it and changed my mind.

If I had my life to live over again I would have waxed less and listened more.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy and complaining about the shadow over my feet, I'd have cherished every minute of it and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was to be my only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.

I would have eaten popcorn in the "good" living room and worried less about the dirt when you lit the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have burnt the pink candle that was sculptured like a rose before it melted while being stored.

I would have sat cross-legged on the lawn with my children and never worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television ... and more while watching real life.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband which I took for granted.

I would have eaten less cottage cheese and more ice cream.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick, instead of pretending the Earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for a day.

I would never have bought ANYTHING just because it was practical/wouldn't show soil/ guaranteed to last a lifetime.

When my child kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now, go get washed up for dinner."

There would have been more I love yous ... more I'm sorrys ... more I'm listenings ... but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it ... look at it and really see it ... try it on ... live it ... exhaust it ... and never give that minute back until there was nothing left of it.

p.s. I’m a little more Daisy Duck now…and I’m just fine with that.